August 30, 2014 with small updates 10/18/15

Why Co-Creation and Procreation Matter (read the introduction to the forthcoming book with the same (working) title here)

This hidden “unpublished” page is for confidential discussion with Integral Friends of my hypothesis and new book project*(“Integral Evolutionary Love Relationships: Why Co-Creation and Procreation Matter) WHY healthy, sustainable love relationships, procreation, and individual/cultural evolution—which are in my opinion all crucial for a sustainable and peaceful future for all humanity—matter.

My arguments below are in no way intended to discriminate against singles who choose not to be in relationships or singles and couples of any sexual orientation who choose not to have/raise children.

Thank you for reading and for your feedback via email ( phone (+1-707-566-2106), or skype (martinucik).

Our evolutionary biological imperative (that we share with all living organisms) is to perpetuate our existence through survival, territorialism, competition, reproduction, quality of life-seeking, and group forming.

The main reason for the stagnation and reversal of cultural evolution (with all its socioeconomic and environmental ramifications) is caused by the drop in healthy relationships and birth rates among women in modern—and more dramatically—postmodern and integral stages of consciousness development (green line in Figure 1. below). It seems to be a reasonable short-term, but problematic and in the long-term unsustainable, evolutionary response from women to the overpopulation of the planet.

There may be a change once women reach postintegral stages of development and realize WHY healthy relationships and procreation matter for the further evolution of humanity. For this to happen, as many men and women as possible need to evolve in a sustainable way into postintegral evolutionary stages of consciousness, love relationships, families, communities, and societies.

The graph below shows why we don’t see an increase in the number of people at postmodern and integral stages of development, but instead a decline, as satirically shown in the movie Idiocracy ( in which two average Americans—an Army private and a prostitute—are sent to the year 2505 after a series of freak events. But when they arrive, they find a civilization so dumbed-down that they’re the smartest people around. See (2 Minutes) to get the idea.


Figure 1: by Martin Ucik

As we can see in Figure 2. below, the birth rates per women decline sharply in mature industrial (Modern) and post-industrial (postmodern) segments of societies. From what I observed, this decline continues into integral levels of consciousness (not covered in the graphic below) where women either choose not to procreate or are to old to do so.

The reasoning for women not to procreate are manifold and include:
It is too much of a burden.
There are already too many people on the planet (see below).
I don’t want to birth children into a f§$%”& up world.
The most important relationship I have is with myself.
I need to learn to love myself first before I can love someone else (and this often becomes a life-long project).
I did not find the right partner/there are no good men (I wrote several newsletters about this phenomenon, see we transcend our primary fantasy and are women more evolved than men).
I don’t have the money to raise a child/children (cost in the US $245.000 till age 18
I am not mature enough to raise a child.
I don’t trust men/marriage.
I want to further my career.
I want to enjoy my life to the fullest and a relationship with children is a hindrance.
I want to travel the world and be fulfilled.
Following my evolutionary passion and purpose is more important than relationship and children (see newsletter).
I am on a spiritual path.
I am too traumatized from my own childhood to raise children.
I did not have good role models.

I postulate that women in post-integral stages of development enter into committed relationships and start to procreate at higher rates again, as they find equal partners in post-integral men, transcend the reasons above, and understand the importance for the future of humanity to have children.


Figure 2.

The map below shows that countries with a mature industrial modern society (or in the case of China a one child per woman law) have birth rates below two per women.


Figure 3:

Red = < 2, Yellow = >2, Green = 3-4, Blue >4, World = 2.58 children per woman. See CIA Statistics with trends per country for 2013.
USA: 2.1 children per woman in 2010 (down to 1.93 in 2011, possibly up to 2.06 in 2013), 2.4 Hispanics, 2.0 African Americans, 1.8 Whites, 1.7 Asian.


As shown in the logarithmic Figure 4 below, global fertility rates are in general decline and this trend is most pronounced in industrialized countries, especially Western Europe, where populations are projected to decline dramatically over the next 50 years. The populations in modern civilizations currently only grow through immigration and higher life expectancies, otherwise they shrink. This makes it very difficult to predict future population development. A decline in population in industrial and postindustrial cultures is predicted.


Figure 4:

Hence, the Unites Nations can not predict further world population development and only give three possible scenarios, of which, from an integral perspective, the Green “U.N. Low” is likely.


Figure 5:
Also see

Figure 6 below shows high numbers of teen pregnancy (magic), a drop in the lower class population who often can’t afford children, a rise in the middle class (most likely mythic/conformist) and a drop in upper middle class (Rational) demographics. This is but one pointer.

Birthrate_Income - Copy

Figure 6:

The scatter plot below shows how closely Bush’s share of the vote in a state correlates with the number of babies per white woman. The blue dot way down in the lower left corner represents Washington D.C. and the red dot way up in the right corner is Utah.

Birthrate_Votes - Copy
Figure 7:

Below we see the dramatic decline of Nuclear families and marriage and the increase in singles, which has continued since 2000.

Family_US - Copy

Figure 8: Other related statistics (PEW),

Figure 9 below shows the decline in US Buddhism, which we may consider a religion that people people with higher levels of consciousness feel drawn to. I observe that the same to be true for the Integral Movement, which also seems on the decline, with the exception of some Scandinavian countries.

Buddhism_Decline - Copy

Figure 9:

We also see a slight decline in the already small group of “Other Faiths” (brown below) which includes Buddhists (0.7%) and New-Age (0.4% of population) and an increase in Agnostics and Atheists, which may indicate a strengthening of the Orange rational stage of development as people may move up from Mythic (Amber/Blue).

Religious_Trends - Copy

Figure 10:

Below is a breakdown of religious affiliations in the US.
Figure 11:

The lower birth rates among more evolved, educated and affluent women also explains why there is NO world-wide rapid upward “shift” in consciousness/spirituality, and no increase in the number of “conscious/spiritual people”, as predicted (or hoped for) by “New-Agers” and the integral community, as it took place during “The Age of Enlightenment” in the late 17th century in Europe. The reason is that, unlike the advancements brought by modernity (especially increased food production and modern medicine), modern and postmodern stages of consciousness development and New-Age spirituality do not provide any additional survival benefits or moral imperatives that lead to an increase in birth rates, but rather a decrease at these stages, and hence the number of people at these higher levels of development are in decline now.

Europen Population - Copy
Figure 12:

Holmes Rolston III, Templeton Prize Winner in 2003 and Gifford Lectures 1997-98 said in a YouTube interview:
“It’s increasingly obvious to me that many of the enterprises of science and theology don’t immediately contribute to leaving more children in the next generation. The neo-Darwinian paradigm essentially says that the kinds of things are selected that leave the most offspring in the next generation. And I think that’s entirely true in the natural world, and there is some degree of truth in the human world with that. But a great deal goes on in the human world that has little to do with leaving more offspring in the next generation. Essentially, the idea is that cultural and technological innovations jump across genetic lines with great speed, whereas genetics is a different process of reproducing from generation to generation. Ideas move from mind to mind, but I don’t know that these ideas are always selected with reference to what helps the listeners leave the most offspring in the next generation. Today, I am in the company of Astronomers, Cosmologists, Philosophers and others, and it’s difficult for me to think that all of their arguments are directed to they themselves adding more offspring in the next generation. That doesn’t mean that evolutionary theory is wrong, it just means that it is incomplete and unsatisfactory, dealing with cultural evolution.”

It has been argued that people who focus on raising consciousness instead of raising children lift up all humanity through the downward mobility of their postmodern/integral ideas/consciousness), regardless if they themselves and their followers produce offspring. People who believe in reincarnation also sometimes argue that they and many others will be re-born at a higher level of consciousness, so procreating in this lifetime is irrelevant for the advancement of consciousness.
But these assumption seem wrong to me. Just as we see a very low rate of socioeconomic upward mobility, especially in the US, we also see a low rate of consciousness and spiritual upward mobility.

EconomicMobility - Copy
Figure 13:

As we see below, (attractive) daughters, especially in the US, “marry up” and/or get better educated …

Figure 14:
… while sons are more likely to be stuck in their social strata.

Figure 15:

Since wealthy people seem to procreate less, keep their wealth among themselves, block legislation that would increase taxes, and prevent social programs, we see an ongoing upward distribution of wealth, along with environmental destruction.

This correlates with the little upward mobility in most education systems as seen below.

OECD_Educational_Mobility_2 - Copy

Figure 16:


And since “progressives” procreate less, there are not enough people to vote for real political change. As shown below, less educated and poor people vote less than educated and affluent people.
Figure 17:

Figure 17a:

The lower birth rates in more evolved people and cultures leads to over-aging populations, with exploding healthcare costs (unless advancements are made that would reduce medical costs or our end-of-life morality would (euthanasia) change) and unmanageable increases in retirement benefits which fewer young people have to shoulder, who may not be willing or able to do so.


Figure 18:


Figure 19:

The potential upshot is that world-wide population growth may slow down, as emerging cultures may move into modern and postmodern stages of development. Again, the jury on this is still out as we see in the conflicts that erupt in emerging countries (Arab Spring, Ukraine, Africa etc.) But the decrease in populations in modern societies is likely to cause an increase of suffering, especially in middle and lower social classes.
The lower birthrates among well-off modern and postmodern populations may have positive effects for the environment in developed countries, while higher birthrates in emerging economies will be negative as more people move into modern lifestyles.

A revision of integral holon theory:

For an integral understanding of the underlying dynamics we need a revision of social holon theory.

Integral holonic theory maintains that stacking social holons on top of individual holons is a fallacy, that the depth/value of holons increases in individual holons with size and less span, and decreases in depth/value in social holons.
I think this is only partially correct. Social holons also depend on the presence of the lower, at least over time, and the greatest depth is at the level of couple holons, as they are the only social holons that reproduce and sustain new life in organisms that procreate through combining their genes. In addition, cultural and social evolution advances in the dialectic of male-female relationships, with women rewarding those males with love and sex who create the highest good, truth and beauty for their and their potential offspring’s benefit.

Ken Wilber wrote in Grace and Grit about his late wife Treya.
“I am immeasurably more, and immeasurably less, because of her presence. Immeasurably more, for having known her; immeasurably less, for having lost her.”

Below is a typical sequence of individual and social holons.


Figure 19: Martin Ucik
Individual consciousness, organisms, collective cultures and societies actually tetra arise as shown below. This may need some slight revision though.

Slide1_Holons720 - Copy

Figure 20: Ken Wilber with additions by Martin Ucik
Nevertheless it is obvious that we need individual humans to form couples who procreate to form nuclear families, which become the foundation for thriving communities, peaceful societies and a sustainable humanity.



Figure 21: by Martin Ucik

If we take a closer look at each individual holon we notice that it has four essential dimensions (I, We, It and Its quadrants).


Figure 22: From Integral Relationships

and four potential polarities/drives (masculine ascending and agency, and feminine descending and communion.


Figure 23: From Integral Relationships

By balancing and harmonizing these for polarities the holon can be simultaneously a part (instrumental/fundamental) of larger holons and whole and complete (intrinsic/significant) in itself.

Figure 24: by Martin Ucik

Social holons do not have four quadrants, but have the four potential polarities/drives. Each polarity/drive has a healthy and unhealthy expression and can be more or less developed in males and females. Males and females also have five potential stages of anima (males) and animus (females) complex. The feminine/masculine polarities/drives tend to shift for males and females during vertical consciousness development and can be different for each quadrant, while the anima/animus complex can be present in various forms at each stage of vertical consciousness development (similar to sexual and spiritual state/stages, even though the anima/animus complex is a stage).


Figure 25: Personality Matrix by Martin Ucik

Different relationship and procreation dynamics emerge in premodern, modern, postmodern, integral and postintegral individual and social holons:

In premodern magic and egocentric as well as conventional mythic societies, males tend to be masculine and females tend to be feminine. This results in complementary traits between males and females, and dependence. There is an equal amount of males and females in these societies. Since there is no birth control and offspring is necessary for survival, most males and females pro-create as much as possible and form very close knit multigenerational nuclear families.


Figure 26: by Martin Ucik

In modern rational societies, males and females tend to be masculine. Women no longer need men for their survival and status, can control pregnancies, and social norms no longer require them to get married and have children. Also, many women enter into stage four of their animus complex. Still, some males and females form couples and procreate, but at much smaller rates (1-2 children per woman), some stay in nuclear families, with divorce rates around 50% (of which women initiate 70%) while others raise children as single parents, and there are overall many more singles who sometimes form loosely connected relationships in these communities.


Figure 27: by Martin Ucik

In postmodern communities, males tend to be feminine and females tend to be descending and oscillating between agency and communion (which is exhausting). Women often see themselves as superior and more evolved than men (which is statistically true) and are often emasculating … it is payback time, so to speak. There are more females than males in these communities. Marriage and having children is seen as regressive and oppressive. A very small number of males and females enter into committed relationships, procreate and form nuclear families at this level, and rather enter into polyamorous or other forms of non-committed relationships and declare them as the highest form of being and relating while missing the “becoming” part of our existence.


Figure 28: by Martin Ucik

The graphic below, attributed to Prof. Donald Symons (The Evolution of Human Sexuality), shows the sexual selection dynamic (or lack thereof) that the Primary Fantasy has created in modern and postmodern societies:


Figure 29: by Martin Ucik

At the integral level of development, males and females tend to be ascending, agentic and communal, but not descending. There is a new sense of respect and equality between the sexes. There seem to be more males than females at this stage of development, but with still only about 1% of the population in this stage, the jury is still out. Also, since females tend to transcend and include, while males tend to transcend and exclude, as shown in the Figure 29A below, women at the Green postmodern level are basically “Integral”, even though it is unconscious to them.

Truly integral males and females see the importance of relationships for learning, healing and growing (waking up, growing up, cleaning up, showing up) but many have a hard time finding a partner or sustaining a relationship, because of a lack of healthy descending qualities and embodiment (hence Integral Relationship Workshops and the Integral Relationship Practitioners Trainings), and integral people often don’t procreate or are too old.


Figure 30: by Martin Ucik

At post or superintegral levels of development, males and females equally embody healthy feminine and masculine polarities and balance and harmonize them between each other in all four quadrants along all the seven chakras at a gross, subtle and causal level. These equal and opposite couples also share an evolutionary purpose that serves the greatest good for the largest number of people and see the importance of committed relationships, pro-creation and stable nuclear families for a sustainable future of humanity. With only 0.1% of the population at this level, it is hard to say if there are more males or females at this stage. Singles at this level are willing to move, sometimes even to other continents, to be with their postintegral soul-mate.

Figure 31: by Martin Ucik

For this shift into a sustainable future for humanity to take place, we need more couples with equal rights and responsibilities in postintegral stages of development, instead of the asymmetrical exchange at the lower levels (money/status for sex) in previous stages of development. See newsletters about the 12 Values for Integral Relationship Evolutionaries.



Figure 32 and 32A: by Martin Ucik

This requires a further differentiation and redefining of social holons:

Individual and human social holons increase in size from Atoms to Humanity.


Figure 33: by Martin Ucik

As outlined above, there is a difference between individual holons, which have a single driving or dominant force/monad and social holons, which have a shared resonance.

Since only individual holons have a dominant monad, Integral theory maintains that the most complex individual holons (humans as far as we know) have the greatest value or depth, while social holons decrease in depth with their size.


Figure 34: by Martin Ucik

Postintegral theory maintains that the greatest depth is in the co-creative space between two individual holons, as new life can only be co-created between the two, new ideas emerge through dialectic (thesis-antithesis-synthesis), and they only become cultural and social norms if they are rewarded by females who choose males for love relationships and, in the long-term, procreation.


Figure 35: by Martin Ucik

Span indicates the number of holons at each level. Many atoms form one human, many humans form one humanity. Below is an ideal span for human social holons.


Figure 36: by Martin Ucik

With the decreasing number couples and families, as well as lower birth rates in modern and postmodern societies, we create modern and postmodern societies that will eventually collapse and taken over by humans in pre-modern stages of development, as they are not sustained and supported by younger couples in nuclear families at modern and postmodern stages.


Figure 37: by Martin Ucik

Ideal individual and social holonic structures in size, span and depth.


Figure 38: by Martin Ucik

Hence my argument and forthcoming book about he importance of responsible co-creation between equal and opposite partners, and sustainable levels of pro-creation at modern, postmodern and higher stages of consciousness development.

A few relevant quotes:

It’s 3:23 in the morning, and I’m awake,
because my great, great grandchildren won’t let me sleep.
My great, great grandchildren ask me in dreams,
“What did you do, while the planet was plundered?
What did you do, as the Earth was unraveling?
Surely you did something as the seasons were failing;
as the mammals, reptiles, and birds were all dying…?
Did you fill the streets with protest when the democracy was stolen?
What did you do, once you Knew?”
Excerpt from “The Heiroglyphic Stairway” by Drew Dellinger:

“Humanity is under great pressure to evolve because it is our only chance of survival as a race. This will affect every aspect of our life and close relationships in particular. If we accept that relationships are here to make us [more] conscious instead of happy, then relationships will offer us salvation. For those who hold on to the old patterns, there will be increasing pain, violence, confusion, and madness.“
Eckhart Tolle, The Power Of Now

“The proof of the depth and embodiment of your realization will be seen in your love relationship. That’s where the proof is in the pudding. If it all collapses in your relationship, you have some work to do. And people do have a lot of difficulties in their relationships.”

“The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking (consciousness) we were at when we created them”
Attributed to Albert Einstein

By the time we reach the noosphere, in humans, relative autonomy of such a high degree that it can produce not just differentiation from the environment, which is necessary, but dissociation from the environment, which is disastrous—an expression of pathological agency that, among many other things, lands it squarely in ecological hell.
Ken Wilber, Sex, Ecology, Spirituality page 78/79.

“The passage from immature to mature monogamy is not just a journey of ripening intimacy with a beloved other, but also a journey into and through zones of ourselves that may be quite difficult to navigate, let alone get intimate with and integrate with the rest of our being. But however much this passage might ask of us, it gives back even more, transforming us until we are established in the unshakable love, profound passion, and radically intimate mutuality that epitomize mature monogamy. And even if we don’t end up in such a relationship, our having taken the journey toward it will immeasurably benefit us in whatever we do.”
Robert Augustus Masters Transformation through Intimacy – The Journey Towards Mature Monogamy on the page before the Introduction.

“The more whole we become the more partial we need to become in order to avoid uneven development. Avoiding the right (love relationships/the opposite sex) by always turning left has us going in circles.”
Martin Ucik

Translate »