Learn about the 26 IR Modules in our Facilitator and Private Trainings or Personal Consultations

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Nobody loves me. What is wrong with me?

Nobody loves me. What is wrong with me?

You are not alone. Singles who yearn for a partner and couples who experience relationship stress often feel that nobody loves them, or that they are not lovable and that there is something wrong with them; and that includes me at times. Of course, this is not true....

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Why would a person lie?

Why would a person lie?

Because he/she does not feel safe with you or does not trust you to be able to hear his or her truth without rejecting, judging, or punishing. People may also lie to themselves and other out of shame, fear, or guilt. Telling the truth can be a very vulnerable and...

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How can I tell true and permanent love?

How can I tell true and permanent love?

Love and relationships between humans are always conditional, because, unlike animals like penguins, we are self-conscious and have developing minds with changing needs and desires. True and permanent, or unconditional love, only exists as a potential when we become...

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Is it really important to find my life purpose?

Is it really important to find my life purpose?

It may not be important to you personally, but it is important for the rest of us. Like all living beings, you already live the essential parts of your purpose; to survive, to join groups, and to seek the best possible quality of life or happiness. Finding and living...

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What to look for in my soulmate?

What to look for in my soulmate?

Your soul is like the seed of a plant. It holds your full human potential, just like an acorn holds the potential to grow into an oak tree. Soulmates uniquely see each other's full human potentials and complement and challenge each other to realize it. These...

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How can I build my future?

How can I build my future?

As John Lennon said and we all experience right now, “life is happening while we make other plans.” So in that sense, we cannot build our future. The things that had the biggest impact on my life, such as meeting my wife and mother of my three children, finding a...

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How do I attract miracles into my life?

How do I attract miracles into my life?

By realizing that being alive in itself is a miracle and by opening up to all the possibilities and invitations that you are presented with from moment to moment. Unfortunately, the Ego, our separate and false sense of self, sees life as a problem, as lacking, as...

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How can I have a sense of fulfillment?

How can I have a sense of fulfillment?

This is a great question, especially in these times of uncertainty and transformation. Many studies show that humans who live their purpose and are in happy love relationships are most healthy and fulfilled. There are three broad layers of purpose that also define who...

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What is life?

What is life?

I picked this question because of the movie “The Tree of Life” with Jessica Chastain, Sean Penn and Brad Pitt that we will watch tonight. In it, we see how a religious family struggles with this very question after one of their members dies. All healthy humans...

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I want to understand women’s souls more deeply.

I want to understand women’s souls more deeply.

Carol Gilligan wrote in her famous book “In a Different Voice” that gave me sleepless nights: “Men try to understand others by understanding themselves; women try to understand themselves by understanding others.” If this resonates with you as it did with me, then you...

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I can’t find love. What can I do?

I can’t find love. What can I do?

Divided couple are separated by white wall Of course my answer is to become integrally informed about love relationships by integrating the essential wisdom from the East (e.g. chakras and spirituality) with the scientific knowledge from the West (e.g. psychology,...

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How to create a common Relationship language.

How to create a common Relationship language.

The first step is to identify what level of consciousness you and your partner are at (magic, egocentric, conformist, rational, pluralistic, or integral), as people at different levels use different arguments for validating what is good, true, beautiful and practical...

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How can I love unconditionally?

How can I love unconditionally?

There are two forms of unconditional love. One is localized, for example loving a child, pet, parent or  partner unconditionally. This means, whatever will happen, I extend myself for the purpose of nurturing your material and physical well-being, as well as your...

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Why do the conflicts in our marriage repeat?

Why do the conflicts in our marriage repeat?

There can be multiple reasons, or a combination of them. Naturally, becoming integrally informed and experienced is the foundation for identifying resolving any relationship conflict. Below are a few reasons why you struggle:The first may be that you may have...

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Is anger and fear inevitable?

Is anger and fear inevitable?

Being able to feel emotions is part of what makes us human. So yes, they are inevitable. Primary emotions evolved in response to challenges faced by our remote ancestors and became ‘hardwired’ into different parts of our brains. They are commonly identified as...

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Is it a mistake to care more about sex than love?

Is it a mistake to care more about sex than love?

If you are totally clear and honest about your intentions, feelings and desires, if they are mutal, and if the sex is consensual and healthy, then I see no problem with caring more about sex than love. However, it can be tricky, as women often get attached after sex...

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Why are there no evolved men around me?

Why are there no evolved men around me?

First of all, no woman knows “all” men and may stand in her own way of attracting an “evolved” partner by thinking this way.  Secondly, there are multiple developmental lines or intelligences that humans can evolve in, such as consciousness, cognitive,...

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How can I attract miracles into my life? Why do I attract people with negative energy and mentally sick people in my relationships in recent years? How can I attract the right partner for a soulmate relationship? Why have I attracted what I’ve attracted so far in my life?

How can I attract miracles into my life? Why do I attract people with negative energy and mentally sick people in my relationships in recent years? How can I attract the right partner for a soulmate relationship? Why have I attracted what I’ve attracted so far in my life?

First of all, the fact that we were born and are alive conscious human beings is already a miracle. We are the luckiest and freest people who have ever lived, no matter how unhappy, unfortunate, mistreated, oppressed, manipulated, misunderstood, victimized or...

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How can I find my soulmate?

How can I find my soulmate?

There are three levels of soulmates. Each higher level transcends and includes the previous one. Your first step is to become clear what level of soulmate you want to find/attract. A “Biological Soulmate” that you feel physically attracted to, experience “chemistry”...

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How can I live my purpose and find my soulmate?

How can I live my purpose and find my soulmate?

The first step is to realize that you have a Biological Purpose that you share with all other living creatures. It determines who you are physically attracted to and compatible with in your lifestyle choices. The second step is to get clarity about your psychological...

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Do spiritually evolved people lose sexual desire?

Do spiritually evolved people lose sexual desire?

The sex hormones testosterone, estrogen and dopamine, and the associated neurotransmitters that act upon the nucleus accumbens, regulate libido in humans. These chemicals are either naturally released so that we experience lust and desire to make babies, or heightened...

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I am afraid of getting married. I am always the one who changes other’s tune and I am afraid of being cheated. I am also afraid of being abandoned. I’m afraid of marriage. I’m always the one in the relationship and apologizing: I have a fear of being cheated and I have a fear of being abandoned.

I am afraid of getting married. I am always the one who changes other’s tune and I am afraid of being cheated. I am also afraid of being abandoned. I’m afraid of marriage. I’m always the one in the relationship and apologizing: I have a fear of being cheated and I have a fear of being abandoned.

Thank you for your question. I sense your conflict between being in committed safe relationship, and your fear of disappointment. Your conflict is most likely related to a highly avoidant and/or highly anxious attachment style. If that is the case, see my answer to ...

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Trust and value problem in a relationship

Trust and value problem in a relationship

Thank you for your questions. It can be very scary when we no longer trust our partner and when our values don’t match. Trust is mainly an inside job. This means, we don’t trust ourselves enough to be OK when someone else would let us down, and/or we don’t have...

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Not being able to meet/to be relaxed.

Not being able to meet/to be relaxed.

Thank you for your question. Do you mean to physically meet and relax together? Are there practical reasons (time, money, distance, no place to meet etc.) or emotional reasons (not enough attraction, fear, shame, different needs and expectations?). maybe you can...

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