Integral sexuality includes practices in the singular “upper left” interior (spiritual practice, shadow, and trauma work), and “upper right” exterior (physical exercise, nutrition, rest, strengthening PC muscle, hormonal balance, etc.), and plural “lower left” interior (sharing of vulnerable feelings, sexual fantasies, breaking of cultural limitations around sexual conditioning, transcending fear and shame, etc.) and “lower right” exterior (creating sacred space for sexuality) as shown below. In other words, it brings all dimensions of our being into intimate, healing, and pleasurable contact with our partner … the conscious and unconscious interior, exterior, singular, plural.
The image above: Integral Sexuality
The Integral Sexuality module also connects our previous modules 1 – 12 around four dimensions of relating, levels of consciousness development, biological sex, learned gender roles, the fear-shame downward spiral, and healthy feminine-masculine polarities with the following modules 14 – 26 of anima-animus complex, personality types, attachment styles, personality disorders, forms of love and dependence, purpose, soulmates, and co-creation at the level of the seven chakras.
The image above: Essential Elements of Integral Relationships
Unlike structure stages or levels of vertical consciousness development, temporary states of sexual experience are “free”, because they can be experienced spontaneously (as a peak experience, etc.) at any level of vertical consciousness development. However, for most people, it requires practices to make them permanently accessible as a stage. Hence the name State/Stages.
In any case, our sexual experiences are then interpreted and communicated from our level of consciousness development, which we explore(d) in Modules 2 to 8 of our training.
The image above: Consciousness-Sexuality Matrix (inspired by the Wilber-Combs Matrix)
1. Repressed Sexuality
In this lowest stage, the body and sex are viewed with suspicion as something negative and dirty.
In the fucking stage, sexuality is animalistic, self-serving, and limited to the physical pleasures of the body, often only of one partner. Sex partners at this stage tend to objectify each other without seeking a deeper personal and emotional connection.
3. Having Sex
In this stage, mindfulness comes into play. Sex becomes a conscious choice between couples that have a mutual understanding and agreement about the implications and consequences of becoming sexual. Having sex is seen as a beautiful and important activity that brings two people together and provides many physical and emotional health benefits.
4. Making Love
In the lovemaking stage, a couple’s sexuality becomes the expression of their genuine love, mutual acceptance, deep emotional intimacy, and the joy of being together. Body, mind, heart, and soul become integrated in their lovemaking, which is no longer just “a thing that couples do,” but an expression of who they are as sexual human beings.
5. Sacred (Transcendent/Tantric) Sexuality
This stage represents all advanced sacred or tantric sexual practices that lead to spiritual state experiences through sexual union, such as Kundalini awakenings and chakra activation, that transcend the lovers’ sense of separation from each other and the universe. This kind of sexuality emerges as a stage between partners that share a deep spiritual connection, enjoy a high level of physical, emotional, and relational health, and have reached an advanced stage of spiritual development (see Spiritual Development Module 12) with the ability for intense presence and full surrender.
In the practice part for Module 13, we begin with a guided partner meditation, followed by eye gazing, healing touch, and a deep, vulnerable, and honoring conversation about our sexuality (contact me if you would like to receive the questions we use.)
Join us to explore and practice Integral Sexuality with us in the new training.