Ending the confusion between sex, gender, and feminine/masculine polarities:
Nature and nurture:
• Discuss the evolutionary nature-given differences between males and females, and the culturally constructed, learned gender roles that are nurtured through society in gender-divided and co-ed groups.
• Learn how sexual and mate selection, as well as co-creation and pro-creation have shaped our past and present, and will shape our future.
These conversations among and between the sexes will allow you to develop a deeper understanding of the similarities and differences between males and females, and to develop more tolerance and compassion that will benefit you in your own relationships and in the work with your clients.
The fear/shame downward spiral:
• Take a deep dive into the evolutionary conditioned fear/shame dynamic between males and females that has sabotaged so many relationships and learn how to break out of the downward spiral that otherwise leads relationships to crash.
• Identify where you and your partner may be on the 10 crucial points of the downward spiral that sucks the life out of so many relationships.
• Learn how to reverse the direction in the downward spiral and find back to love and romance.
These insights will allow you to see early warning-signs of the descent down the spiral and to support couples in avoiding the relationship crash.
Go beyond differentiating biological nature and learned gender roles between the sexes (which we explored in Module One) by deeply feeling into the opposing energies of the two feminine and masculine polarities that both sexes can equally embody as growth potentials in each of the four dimensions of our being (quadrants).
Discover the healthy expressions of each polarity that we want to cultivate, and the unhealthy expressions that we want to heal.
This experience will allow you to identify in which of the four polarities and quadrants you have healing and growth potentials to create vibrant and sustainable sexual energy, as well as synergy in your day to day life with your partner, and to support your clients in doing the same.
Always partial, already whole:
• Realize that we as humans, as all other organisms, are always partial to our social and cultural environment, and already whole in ourselves.
• Practice how to balance and harmonize this simultaneous whole/partialness in each of the four essential dimensions/quadrants of our humanness through self-transcendence, self-immanence, agency and communion.
• Understand how our capacity to integrate these seemingly paradoxical opposites leads to avoidant, anxious and secure attachment styles, and how they are different for individuals and groups.
These insights will allow you to support the co-creation of healthy relationships at the level of body, mind, heart, and soul/spirit by setting them into a cultural and social context.
Suggested Reading Material:
Ken Wilber, Terry Patten, Adam Leonard, and Marco Morelli. 2008. Integral Life Practice – A 21st Century Blueprint for Physical Health, — Emotional Balance, Mental Clarity, and Spiritual Awakening. Integral Books
Fisher, Helen. 2004. Why We Love: The Nature and – Chemistry of Romantic Love. Henry Holt and Company
Farrell, Warren and Sterba, James P. 2008. Does Feminism Discriminate Against Men: A Debate. Oxford University Press.
Levine, Amir and Heller, Rachel. 2012. Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – and Keep – Love
Love, Patricia and Stosny, Steven. 2007. How to Improve Your Marriage without Talking about It. Broadway.
Salmon, Caterine and Symons, Donald. 2001. Warrior Lovers: Erotic Fiction, Evolution and Female Sexuality. Yale University Press
Combs, Allan. 2009. Consciousness Explained Better: Towards an Integral Understanding of the Multifaceted Nature of Consciousness. Paragon House
Ken Wilber, Parts of Sex Ecology & Spirituality ES or A Brief History of Everything that cover Holons.
Witt, Keith. 2014. Integral Mindfulness: Clueless to Dialed in – How Integral Mindful Living Makes Everything Better.